I cannot do it all

There is so much to do and so little time.  I've heard it said often and I have said it myself.  Some days, I wonder how I would have done all the extra things if I were a working parent and my kids went to school outside my home.  Well that's not a fair comparison because those who work outside the home do not have all of their daily activities happening and making messes in their homes.  This past Monday is a prime example.  I cleaned the kitchen and swept the floor while the kids were working on their school work.  We had choir practice and a volleyball game and were away from the house for 5-6 hours.  We got home and I made supper, frozen pizza for the kids and homemade low carb pizza for myself.  I cleaned up after myself, but the kitchen was a disaster.  My kids make their own meals for lunch and with the hurried nature of getting out the door, the bread wasn't wrapped tightly, there was a cheese wrapper on the counter.  Spills and crumbs on another counter.  Dishes were not put in the dishwasher and the pizza boxes never made it farther than the dining room table.  There were chunks of mud on the kitchen floor.

One could talk about how my kid should be more disciplined at cleaning up after themselves.  I have a secret for you... home schooled kids are kids too.  Some are clean and some are sloppy.  Some are careful and some are eccentric.  I have walked with my kids as toddlers and used their hand to pick up trash on the floor and helped them throw it away.  I have taught them repeatedly that the table needs wiped off if you clear it.  I have taught them to clean the stove top after a spill and close the bread wrapper.  My kids are still normal kids with attention spans of toddlers and they don't automatically do what is right.  I really don't think they see the mess sometimes.  

I'm not the perfect parent either.  I am not a naturally t
idy person.  I fall more into the eccentric category than disciplined and orderly.  I really like some of my life to be very organized and planned, but other areas are fly by the seat of my pants.  For me to establish a good habit I really have to work on it.  I have this problem, though.  I can't do good at everything at the same time.  I am very good about paying bills and balancing my checkbook.  That is, until I'm very good at keeping my kitchen clean.  I'm great at that until I'm good at getting dressed nicely every day and keeping myself looking good.  I think you get the picture. For every good habit I've formed, it seems I have an equal and opposite bad habit.  There was a time I thought maybe I was bipolar, but now I realize that I'm just a normal person trying to do it all at once or give up on all of it because I can't be do everything well.  I want to be the crafty homeschool mom who does neato things with the kids all the time while keeping an immaculate house and takes them to all their activities while being an active volunteer at church and keeping my spiritual habits in check and keeping tabs on the news and making time for myself and my husband with the clever date nights and being the encourager and volunteer when things need done and make beautiful menus and and and and.  Woah!  I'm just one person and I can't do it all!

As I've matured, ok aged, I have truly developed some good healthy habits.  I found a good time for myself to read the Bible every day.  I make my bed in the mornings and take care of the animals.  I take my morning vitamins and am following a healthy eating plan.  I'm trying to find time to make priority out of the important things.  I fail with my husband and my kids and correspondence and communication more often than not, but I think I need to give myself credit for the good habits I DO have.  And the good habits I do have came over time.  They came through trial and error, and they also came one at a time.  Baby steps.  Whenever I try to start on Monday and do all that I aspire toward, I fall flat on my face!  

Another thing I am recognizing is that I DO have time when I think I don't.  Yesterday, I made granola.  You have to stir it every 15 minutes.  Normally I would put it in the oven and sit on Facebook or some computer game while I wait for each timer.  Today, I had some tasks I wanted to complete.  I cleaned and swept our guest bathroom in 8 minutes.  I then put away the dirty rag and got a new one and went in to the master bath.  I didn't finish it when the first 15 minute timer went off.  I washed my hands, stirred the granola and set out to scrub the tub.  I ran our of cleaner, so I had to reconstitute more, so I wasn't finished at the second timer.  I washed my hands, stirred the granola and then went back to work.  I finished the master bath and swept the kitchen again and put all my supplies away before the 3rd timer went off.  This really was a big deal for me to start to recognize that while I can't do it all, I can do more than I have been doing.  

Just as I had to limit my kids' electronics including listening to music until they met certain goals, I need to ground myself from media that takes my attention completely.  So I guess I'm just saying that if I and if you as a homeschool parent has aspirations to do better, we need to try and pace ourselves.  Also, I need to give myself grace when I can't complete everything I had planned.  Balance is key!  I need to prioritize which habits are eternal, which are meaningful and which need to go.  I would rather be proud of balance than busyness.

Yes, No, I don't know!

Saying yes or no seems simple.  When you have several opportunities to do things you enjoy, of course the answer seems simple, "yes!"  There are times that everything seems to be well-balanced, but then it turns out that everything you say yes to, lands about the same time.
Yes, being a homeschool family gives you freedom to start and end your school days when you can or want to.  It gives you freedom to have days off when other schools are in session, and hold school while area schools are in recess.  It doesn't mean that you have more time than other families, though.  Well, not in the same way at least.  And we still must meet several state requirements to be in compliance with the law.  I got so busy this last few weeks, I didn't review my lessons for this week and it makes a big impact! 
There are weeks that we are all less prepared than others, but I was convicted last year to make sure that I am as prepared for my own kids as I am when I teach a class at church or lead worship.  When I was working full-time, I studied before my meetings and when I was on committees, I gave my best.  My kids deserve no less!  I would be furious if I sent my kids to another style of school and the teachers were ill-prepared and yelled at my kids when communication failed.  Yeah, that happens here on occasion.
There was a time that I tried writing some of my own material to save on money or other reasons.  It was an ok thing and I do enjoy that, but it turns out that it is not for me!  I am more of one to adapt the material to fit my kids and their needs.  They somehow learn in spite of me at times, but I love the interaction of them learning because of me.  If I plan to adapt the material to fit the lesson theme and don't even know what we will be discussing, that is a problem!  Some weeks I can prepare during the school hours, but other weeks I can't. 
For me it takes a good 5 + hours to plan for a week of school for 2 kids.  I have already made a layout of what I want to accomplish through the year in each subject and that took some time as well.  I would say that I am at the point in preparation that people who get a boxed curriculum set are in.  The disadvantage is that I don't have a concise list of supplies laid out for me.  I choose not to make these lists in advance because it requires too much redundancy.  I just do it when I make my shopping list for the week.  I preview the language material so that I know that I can help with questions.  I preview the science experiments to make sure they are doable in our home.  I look through our history curriculum because I don't remember most of it and I like to learn with the kids!  We also have many activities to choose from in history and some of them that I chose when I laid out the year aren't going to work out at this point. 
Another part for my planning that takes plenty of time is my digital gradebook.  I have chosen the Homeschool Helper (HH) app for record keeping.  It is less paperwork and more paperwork all at the same time.  I use weekly planning pages from donnayoung.org so that I have a layout of what is happening with everyone all in one spot.  On the HH app, I have to click on each student individually and that is ok.  It is so interesting that because there is such a variety of styles of homeschooling parent as well as family size, curriculum choice and state requirements, that there can never be a one-size-fits-all solution to record keeping in a homeschool.  This is working for me, but takes a bit of effort.  I transfer daily assignments to my weekly planning page and then enter them into HH.  The beauty of it is that I don't have to rewrite the assignment to put a grade in.  I can alter things and make comments, but all-in-all, the entry at the beginning saves me time with grading in the end.
So I will let my yes be yes, and my no be no!  BUT I will keep in mind before giving a yes or no that I only have a short time left with my kids and open-ended dates will be considered differently than solid dates.  I need to be intentional about keeping a good universal calendar so that I don't over-plan!  Outside experiences and watching the good and bad parts of a parent juggling activities are an education in itself.  Oh the joys of figuring out balance! 

Week One ... Success!

Sis doing Life of Fred math

So grateful to God for the opportunity to have a direct roll in the education of my children!  This week has a few rough spots, but all in all it has been wonderful!
We have completed book work at a decent time every day!  My house is not a disaster, but it isn't spectacular either.  I'm over that!  I refuse to try to be what I see others be.  We do not live in filth, but I don't even aspire to live in a spotless shining mansion!  Mostly because I don't want to clean one.





Crystal Palace

We are still loving Story of the World and I've decided to do one book over a 2 year period this time.  It is great to have the freedom to take a closer look at each culture and spend time getting a feel for what took place in that time period.  Today we made a primitive model of the Crystal Palace from Great Britain's "Great Exhibition of the Works of Industry of All Nations."  It turned out alright!


I'm hoping this isn't something short-lived, but my kids are super excited about math.  Math has never EVER been something that the kids were begging to do.  We started Life of Fred this year and the kids love it!  Now I did start them at the beginning so that they would understand the methods used so that may change.  They are each doing several lessons a day and Bub has gone through the first book and a half.  I had to make him stop to do science so we could get done today.  I hope to write more positive about this curriculum later in the year.  I went through the first several books myself, too, and they are kind of fun!

Taping the sections of the Crystal Palace together.

Ready for a great weekend!  We are headed out to do physical education, which will be running today, so I'm signing off from the best first week of school for LSA to date!

Yes, It's that time of year again!

It is time for school!  Today was our first day of school for the 2015-2016 term.  We've done some school activities for this school year, but officially we are into the books!!

First day of 5th grade!  She was dressed, but cold so she wore her robe at the beginning of the day.

Momma's been exercising bright and early since May, so the kids are not getting that sleepy momma in the mornings and that is such a good thing.  We were up and ready and had chores done by our start time of 8:30 AM.  The kids got new journals and fun snacks!  New books and a new way of getting rewards are always a good starting point!



First Day of 7th Grade!  Sadie (puppy) is too young for school!

Since starting homeschool, I've always had a goal of having things in order so that we could have a real start day.  Then circumstances change or they crack the books before our true start or something.  This year I held off on the early start and we are actually starting when I said we would!  I had a plan, I decorated our classroom, I got little gifts and had all the supplies we needed purchased!
The only hitch this morning was when my son opened his language book and mentioned a book study on Black Beauty.  I had a slight panic because I didn't buy that book.  I opened my book and it is not one he has to read, but one that they use a few excerpts from.  Whew!  I'm sure the library has it and we actually found that we do have a copy of that book.  So my fun son who loves to read asked if it was okay for him to read it even if it isn't assigned.  UH, YES!

What Nutmeg thinks about school!

Not going to make any promises that I will keep this blog up this year because as the year rolls, I get busy living and not typing about it.  :)  Granted, a documented year is always fun to look back at!

Is it really Monday?

I can't say this often because Mondays are usually the worst days ever in our home and school.  We have had a great day!  The changes we made to our school day are phenomenal.  I think Dad being home this weekend and knowing that corn harvest is over has helped tremendously as well.  I have a lot more prep work for this new format, but if the result will be more days like this and less of me screaming half the day, I'll take it! 
Maybe what my kids needed was more of me!  More of Dad, too!  I am giving my kids more independence in extracurricular activities as they get older, but it is really important still that their entire days are not self-directed.  They need some order and direction or they truly cannot function.  I think this is why even as a homeschool parent, I still yearn for the school year to begin.  Some parents are anxious to get the kids out of their hair and into the schools, but maybe ... maybe the kids want/need to have some order.  Even as an adult, when I have nothing to occupy my time or nothing to do, I am chaos.  That wasn't a typo, I feel like I am the definition of chaos in those moments.  My husband was off work from Friday until Sunday - a rare thing - and he was very ready to go back to work.  He had to run errands on Friday and we met friends Friday evening and Church Saturday evening, and Sunday morning and Fellowship group Sunday evening, but there was a lot of idle time in there.  For certain, we need the Sabbath rest that God ordained for us, but idleness becomes mental chaos.
I think that was happening to an extent in our homeschool.  Yes, my kids had assignments, but all they were given was a list of tasks, a time to start, a time to have breaks and an expected end time.  For me, that would be great!  I'm an adult who's efficient with my time and has had to learn it over the years.  I might as well have been giving them a manual and some parts and asked them to build a car.  Face to face learning is where I wanted to be with our school, but felt incompetent or unable to do it.  I didn't know how to effectively educate my kids with my voice, my hands, my face...  Today has been a good day!
I think every family will have their curriculum choices, but beyond that choice, I feel that engaging my children with my voice, face and my own style in the midst of our curriculum for at least 15 minutes of every hour has been effective for the whole week last week and today.  They are responding well and today in an angry moment, I was looking at my son's face and saw the expression and we both melted and it ended in understanding of one another.  I still had time for personal Bible Study and lesson planning.  It was just mixed in with the encounter moments.  Hmmmm.  Why does it take so long to figure everything out? 

Normal?? HAHAHA!!! Is there such a thing?

normal

[nawr-muh l]/ˈnɔr məl/                   

adjective

1. conforming to the standard or the common type; usual; not abnormal; regular; natural.

2. serving to establish a standard.

 

This is part of the entry from dictionary.com and I really don't know that we have a common type or standard to go by here at our school.  I don't think we can be defined by others either ... even those who use the exact curriculum mix that we do.  I'm not even sure that anyone else is doing exactly what we're doing.  That's the beauty of homeschool and the difficulty all wrapped in one.  There is no one to consult regarding your specific situation and there is no one like you.

I keep thinking that it would be great to have a normal school day, but the proper term would likely be ideal.  This week we are scheduled to have an ideal school day Wednesday and Thursday.  I'm sick today and my son is getting sick with head colds.  Braces appointment this afternoon.  Playing Hymns at the nursing home tomorrow and scholar's bowl practice tomorrow in the middle of the school day.  I'm okay with interruptions, but I like things to be orderly and predictable.

 

Breathe in ...

 

Breathe out ...

 

It really is going to be okay.  Expect the unexpected.  The kids will learn what they need to learn!  I think I'm doing better now too.  As I began to homeschool, weeks like this would put me in the grumpiest mood before we even start.  Now, well, I have bigger fish to fry.  Things outside of this little home school, but I don't need to delve into them here. 

Homeschooling is not our sole identity.  We have other obligations and for me several of them are due by the end of this week, so I need to direct my attention to them and not freak out because we are not normal and we don't have normal days.  We occasionally have an ideal day here and there, but I guess today may just be a normal day - scattered and unplanned - while Wednesday has a slim chance of being ideal, but abnormal.

I would not change my normal for someone else's normal.  This is the best life for me.

Mornings

I never was a morning person, but learned to be when I had to be at work by 7am. I know there are good habits to get into and I want to train my kids right, but lately mornings have been less than great for me.  When we established our school the rule was that we had to be up, dressed and fed by 8 AM so that school could begin. After we took turns being sick for a few week, our good habits faded and now we are lucky to get started by 9 AM every day.

While it was a good try, I can't expect the kids to do something that I have not done. Now, we do like to be going by 9, but whatever time we start, we all start at the same time and get breaks after each hour of work.  My daughter, the youngest, was slow to get up this morning, so I let her start the day in her pajamas and she ate breakfast while I read a chapter from The Silver Chair and got dressed before the next hour of work began.  We have had pajama days, but the children are less productive in pajamas and so am I.

If we get started and do good work, we usually are done with seat work by lunch time which gives us a great opportunity to have fun lessons in the afternoon.  That is what is so great about our school.  I have found that I need to be in the room with them while they do their morning seat work even if I don't need to help them with anything.  I think just being in there makes them know that the day is seriously a school day and we need to be busy.

Morning things I need to work on.
1. Prayer to start the day
2. Tooth brush checks
3. Looking at the weather and discussing
4. Finding one piece of news for the day to learn about and pray about.

5. Prepare myself for the day to be prepared to teach my children before they are up and ready for me.